Monday afternoon Chris texted me this: Movie night tonight? Vampires? *quirked eyebrow
I was all like, wah? He wants to buy something. Surely he can’t be serious.
But really he hadn’t seen Twilight yet and he was desperate to at least see why I’m obsessed with that Edward guy what the hype was all about. So after tucking the kids in bed we popped in the DVD I snagged on Saturday, that had sadly been sitting neglected on the kitchen counter still suffocating in it’s plastic wrap.
Here is the top five list of comments he made during the move:
- For a guy that never sleeps, Edward has wicked bed head. Yes, yes he does. Would you mind growing your hair out like that?
- So no garlic. No fangs. No holy water. No capes. No coffins. No wooden stakes. No silver bullets. Are you sure this movie is about vampires? Yes, eyeroll. That’s why it’s GOOD.
- Bella can stop running if she’s just wash her stink off once in a while. (bonus extras to this one are below, it went on for hours) Let’s just say that the whole Biology fan scene when she sniffs for b.0. left an impression.
- Why doesn’t she ditch her jankity truck and ride Edward to school? Gigty. Family Guy, I hate you.
- I can read your emotions too! You are pissed off I’m commenting on the movie… Jen, I think I’m a vampire. This was after I explained Jasper’s power, he was not impressed.
So needless to say I don’t think he’s ever going to watch is again unless you count walking past the TV as I watch it over and over and over. 
I think he gave it a very generous 3 stars and one of those stars might have been just cause he loves me. I’ve seen every Star Trek movie just for him, we’re even now.
*** Here are the bonus parts to number 3. I nearly peed myself when I read the squirrel comment.
- Or wears a haz-mat suit.
- Or rubs some dead squirrels on herself.
- Or lives in a hamster ball.
Be sure to remember this when the new Star Trek comes out.
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Jen Reply:
March 25th, 2009 at 6:52 pm
Hehe. I secretly want to see that. Don’t tell Chris.
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This gave me a well needed laugh this evening. Thanks for sharing Jen!
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Jen Reply:
March 25th, 2009 at 6:53 pm
LOL, no problem Maureen…. I was dying to share. I even told him while we were watching that I should be writing it down cause it was hilarious.
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This totally cracked me up! My husband (surprisingly) gave Twilight 4 stars. I think the high rating came as a result of the baseball scene being paired with Muse. He loved it!
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hahahaha, from someone who has worn a HAZMAT suit, you can’t move worth a darn, so it better cut out her smell, or she’d be running from James like the Michelin Marshmellow man! LOL
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Thanks for the laugh. My DH has the same reaction when you tell him there’s no garlic, no coffins, etc in the Twilight series and totally freaks out when you tell him the vampires in this movie sparkle in the sunlight. LOL
Lauras last blog post..I sparkle like Edward… oh wait that’s glitter.
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I’m with your hubby on #2…some parts of it, at least. I was okay with S. Meyer letting the vamps out during the day, and getting rid of the garlic, cross, and silver superstitions. But it felt to me like she basically emasculated the vamps by not giving them fangs. Still liked the story, but wish she’d kept some traditional vamp elements besides just drinking blood.
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that is sooooo funny!! especially number 5 after you explained Jasper to him..LOL At least he has a great sense of humor…
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oh my stars, this is post bleeds funny! you and hubby seem quite well suited (and i know how much we love a man who will do that witty-banter thing with us, eh?).
nics last blog post..woot!woot! we have a winner (or two)
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Jen Reply:
March 31st, 2009 at 6:11 pm
Hehe, he is a funny one I tell you. He did get a good chuckle out of my commentary when he read the post.
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