I'm innocently sitting at my desk taking attendance and checking the absurd amount of email I get in a 45 minutes span of time when one of my advanced art students comes up and asks a question about graded value. She's all:
Student: Mrs. S. I don't get graded value
Me: Here let me show you. I start drawing on the back of her paper.
Student: Oh, yeah, I remember now.
Me: ...still coloring the example
Student: I went dove hunting this weekend
Me: WHAT! You were shooting innocent pretty birds!! (I'm not a big fan of hunting in general but especially not the pretty stuff…yeah, yeah, you can lecture me about the inhumanity about that later.)
Student: giggles…it wasn't that many.
Student: And I had to rip the heads off.
Me: EW!! turning green from the mental image of my student going all Ozzie Osborn on me.
Student: Well my dad said that keeps them from suffering.
Me: Well, that's noble of you.
Student: They come off pretty easy.
Me: I blacked out for brief moment. Um, you can go sit down now. Student stays at my desk, giggling.
Student: I only got one. My dad got the rest.
Me: Really. go. sit. down. NOW.
Student: Giggles hysterically and goes back to her seat.
I'm now seriously reconsidering the merits of my goal to be the nice, approachable, fun teacher instead of the mean, moody, never talked to teacher.